Is my awkwardness really that bad?

This is something that was also in my gratitude app and journal along with the daily zen I wrote this morning.

There is no doubt I am “awkward” in especially my family’s eyes. Weirdness has never been acceptable to them. Normalcy, conformity, has always been expected.

So, as a result, I was labeled the sick one or crazy one in my family. That’s what I ended up believing as well.

But being gay or having mental health issues doesn’t make me any less of a person than they are.

It makes me different, yes, but is that so bad? Sometimes I struggle taking on the opinions of others, their judgments, and I become my own worst enemy.

Especially when it comes to my mental health issues, but that just makes me a stronger person and a fighter. If they felt for one day what it is like to be me, I think they would have a certain respect for me because they would see just how much I have to be strong and persevere. Through all the judgments of the world, being labeled crazy, as well as just experiencing the symptoms.

I have to fight every single day the urge to give up. That makes me strong, not sick or crazy. Maybe God didn’t make them this way because he knew that they wouldn’t be strong enough to endure it when despite how hard it is, I find a way to live with it.

So, I embrace who I am with all the awkwardness that makes me, me.

I found an idea on thinking more positively on my Gratitude app. What do you think? https://gratefulness.page.link/a7ew