There is a thorn wedged deep in my heart. Not sharp enough to call it pain but a weight, thick enough to suffocate my dreams. It lingers there like a troubled spirit who can’t move on into the light. I carry it with me from room to room, from chore to chore, with every second till the next.

Its presence is heavy with hovering grey skies. I get lost in the darkness, with no sense of direction. Wandering, waiting for something, anything. My dreams are fingertips away. Fireflies I can’t catch. 

My memory fades like waves washing away my footsteps. With every minute passing by, I lose control like a sinking ship. I’m waiting for answers that never come,  for the sunshine after the storm. Sometimes I manage to keep it at bay for an hour, maybe two, but the waves always rise, swallowing me like a whale and I sit in its belly, waiting, hoping, and praying.